The struggle of an Introvert in a big social event

I don’t really go to big social events, and when I do, I experience them quite differently from most people. So here’s a glimpse of what goes on the mind of me (an Introvert) in an event where the number of attendees exceeds my freaking out threshold:

Buzzing off and you asking what’s up; I am thinking! Because something just happened and my brain needs to process it. Yes, now!!

Missing out on saying hi to you while you were standing with friends, and instead sitting looking at my phone’s empty screen, thinking: should I go? would I interrupt a conversation? would it be an intrusion?… And only making up for that with an awkward “Hi!” said later, from a distant, with a hand wave.

Even worst: spotting a person I really admire and wanting to say hi to them the entire evening, but walking across the room for that would mean that I have to initiate a conversation, not just greet them and walk back. So, I don’t! Until I’m pleased by the coincidence at the very end of the event where they’d come to my group of people, and I get to say my hi and ask them how they’re doing 🙂

Not getting the social habit of saying your name with the hand shake, to every person you meet for the first time. I won’t remember it (I will, but you won’t!), so why bother? Instead, tell me something that will make me want to ask what your name is!

Meeting an old friend, and the nice friendly person in me goes to talk to them, ask how they’ve been and all that.. but we haven’t seen each other in a while, so we stand, unable to keep the conversation flowing, and wait to be rescued by that other friend who knows them too, and who can.

The awkward moment of meeting a person I’ve been following on social media for a while, and whom I really like;  my excitement, a big smiling hi, a hand shake, and a very warm greeting, while in their head they’re probably wondering who’s this stranger being very pumped at the sight of them.

I don’t dislike events of the sort. I actually like attending, every once in a while (in a LONG time)! My favorite thing about them is the people you have around; the people who make you go to events like this in the first place, the mutual teasings, the side jokes, whispered in the ear of the person next to you, and the looks after something was said, that your twisted minds think there’s a funny side to, so you all laugh without having to state it into words.




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